Suburbian Disorder and Social Distortion

So after a lot of humming and hawing the family and I have decided to go back to our roots, move away from the city's core, and back into suburbia where both my wife and I grew-up. I'm a child of the '70's and 80's and like most kids my age (35 if you must know and yes, still a kid) I don't remember many times outside the suburban sprawl. A perfect environment to build  anti-establishment values. Strip malls, parking lots, manicured lawns and rounded curbs.

The wife and I have found a nice solid late '70's bungalow on a quiet street between the mall and the elementary school. Perfect for raising disturbed youth. The boys will be hating my buttoned down lifestyle my September and calling me a fascist by Christmas. Ahh childhood. Our life, I imagine, will look something like this:

 

We take hold of our plastic fantastic world mid-August so if anyone with a truck, trailer, Mule, or covered wagon has a minute we'd love a hand getting our needless possessions from A to B-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l land of Jones's.